August 16, 2005

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    I figured one of the best ways to
    get over myself … is by getting out of myself.  So, I signed up
    for a good number of weekend volunteer events helping children …
    seniors … animals … what have you.

    I am disgusted with myself in the fact that I have been spending most
    of my days and weekends asleep.  Most days, except for the past
    week or so … I would usually go to sleep around 4 p.m. and wake up at
    9 p.m. … then back to bed at around midnight.  I figured this
    wasn’t good … especially when one weekend it hit me that I had not
    stepped foot outside ONCE!

    I labeled it as a depression of sorts … and I’m trying to get out of
    it and get myself out there.  And … maybe it is that I think too
    much.  But maybe it is better then not thinking at all. 
    Nobody can make that judgement about me in the end though … but it
    brought a realization that I need to change if I want something
    better.  I cannot wait and sulk … hoping.  So I am off to
    “transform” … which means spending a bit less time online … and
    more time outside.  I can honestly say though that this does feel
    so very right!

Comments (6)

  • That is great!!!!!

  • Sounds pretty good too. It’s amazing how many of us wish to have something different in our lives but do not wish to change.

  • it sounds like me what you’ve wrote about sleeping. i’ve done the same. i get off at 3 and am so tired that i go to sleep wake up at 5-6 and then go back to bed at 9. my dad things something’s wrong with me and that it is abad for me. it might be but being awake seems so much like torture sometimes that i don’t mind the long silences sleep gives me.

  • im going to try that volunteering thing. sounds mighty interesting….

    and yeah, i think we all need to let go of the internet….

    -Jess

  • Dear Elizabeth,

    Well, I read one entry telling me you’re going to all these places, and then I read this which says you’re staying in and sleeping. Just goes to show I always did say you lead a “schizophrenic” life. In case I forgot to wish you Happy Birthday, many happy returns of the day.

    Michael F. Nyiri, poet, philosopher, fool

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